Wellness Synergist

At Zero Health, we believe a healthy company culture starts with a healthy company, which is why we measure employee morale hourly using a proprietary blend of surveys and vibes. As Wellness Synergist, you will orchestrate our wellness calendar, lead our Monday intention-setting gong ceremony, and ensure no meeting ends without at least one affirmation.

You will also own our annual offsite, held last year at a retreat center whose wifi policy we are still legally discussing.

What you will do

• Ring the gong at 09:00, 12:00, and 15:00 (sharp)
• Facilitate trust falls, both literal and organizational
• Curate the yurt (cushions, crystals, optional oxygen)
• Convert burnout into "sustainable passion" on performance reviews

What we are looking for

• Certified in at least four frameworks with trademarked names
• Can pronounce "psychological safety" with a straight face in a reorg meeting
• Believes the team that breathes together succeeds together
• Yurt experience strongly preferred

Nice to have

Own gong.